postictal | ic inbox; entranceway

Well I fucking care. I can't keep either of you from dying if you're both going to abandon all semblances of common sense. Jay's apparently a hopeless case, but I thought better of you.

Clementine might not be there next time. I need to know at least one of you will fucking think things through.

what do you want from me
a promise to do better?
cause i'm just so trustworthy?

I don't want your fucking promise. I just want you to do better. Not for me. For Jay, since he's clearly all you care about.

[She's not judging him for that, oddly enough. She'd be the biggest hypocrite in the world if she judged someone for caring about one person exclusively past the point of sense. She'd kill for Shaun. She'd even lie for him. It's not healthy, it's not smart, but it's what she has. How can she judge anyone else for something she herself is just as guilty of?]

Look, I won't tell you not to be a self-sacrificing jackass. I know some things are worth dying for. [Nothing's worth dying for. But some things you can't live with yourself if you don't do.] But use your goddamn brain and make sure you're actually making things better. What you did back there made things worse.

[Maybe she's not judging him for it, but it bites as though she is. Since he's clearly all you care about - he has to resist the urge to fire back something disproportionately cold in turn.]

[She'd - yeah. She'd know.]

it's not like either of us are zombie apocalypse survivors
that was new territory

I know. But you know people who live this on a daily basis. We could have helped.

you've fixed enough of our messes.

If this is some kind of machismo bullshit, you should know refusing to ask for help isn't going to prove anything about the size of your dick.

what
no

i just don't want you feel like you're obligated to keep helping us.

[Particularly when they're both so adept at fucking up.]

I've died and been dragged back to life as an abomination of science. Do you seriously think I feel obligated to do anything I don't want to do anymore?

so why are you bothering

[He's got an uncomfortable idea that he already knows the answer, and pretending otherwise is likely to net him another insult to his intelligence. Well, whatever. It's accurate.]

[He is such a moron. But she knows how he freaks out when she uses the f-word (the one with six letters, not four) and that's not going to help anything.]

Because helping before it turns into a mess we have to fix is in everyone's best interest. Because people other than you and Jay could get hurt. And most importantly, because I want to.

It's not up to you whether or not I've done enough. It's up to me. Do you understand that? I am perfectly capable of setting my own limits.

[She has a logical counter argument, because of course she does. But that's not what stops him dead for several seconds following, sweeping the line of text with a nervous pit coiling in his gut.]

[Because she wants to. Sometimes it takes mere months for these things to manifest; sometimes it takes years. She was at a risk the moment she met him.]

[There's no escaping it now.]

fine.

so what do you suggest?
try to rein jay in?
cause i think you're learning that it's kind of hard to do that

Seriously. I don't think I've met anyone with less common sense, and considering most of my social circle is journalists, that's saying something.

[Shaun pokes zombies with sticks for fun and profit. He's still smarter than Jay.]

Shaun's taking him on as an intern. He's very good at doing stupid shit and surviving. I assume Jay isn't going to stop doing stupid shit, but maybe Shaun can help him be smarter about it.

[That's because Shaun probably makes sure he's armed with more than dinky little flip-knife before he pokes zombies for fun and profit.]

that's
actually a pretty good idea

thanks

or
i should thank him for doing that i guess

[Yes, Shaun brings lots of weapons. And armor. And cameras that he doesn't need to use an entire hand for. And back-up. That's also heavily armed.]

He's the one to thank. I was ready to throw both of you to the zombies.

[She was pissed. She's still pretty pissed.]

pretty sure we already had that covered actually.

So it would have been a pretty easy throw.

something like that.